Life Lessons

For the past several days, I have felt as though I've been transported back to Ethiopia. Being enveloped in the warmth of the Ethiopian community makes my heart swell with pride that my children come from such an amazing place. I have been so humbled and honoured to have had the opportunity to spend time with so many remarkable individuals who are truly making this world a better place. These are some of the lessons that I am in the process of learning from my Ethiopian friends:

It takes a village to raise a child. Children are to be cherished, nurtured, loved, and allowed to explore the world all the while knowing that they have a safe community to come back to. As a parent, I am fully aware that there are times I simply cannot give my children what they need. Perhaps it is because I am physically or emotionally drained. Or maybe they will have asked me a question that I simply don't know the answer to. I've never been good at accepting offers of help, but I'm realizing the importance of a strong support system, and as I work to build mine, I sincerely hope that we can all be resources for one another, no matter what our needs are.

There are no strangers, only friends we have not yet met. The world we live in can be an intimidating place. I struggle with how to teach my children to exercise caution around new people without being afraid to interact with them. In Ethiopian culture, it is perfectly normal for strangers to take your child out of your arms in order to show him / her some affection. Rather than being overly cautious when this happens, I am learning to allow my children to receive this affection, and I am learning that it's okay for me to allow myself a bit of respite without the accompanying guilt that others are taking care of my children.

Find the joy in every moment. Life can be hard, but there is almost always someone worse off. Instead of focusing on the negative, I am learning to live in the moment and seek out the positives. The capacity for joy that the Ethiopian people have is astonishing given the heartbreaking conditions of many of their lives. I have so much to be thankful for, and yet there are too many days that I allow myself to wallow in sadness over the things I don't have.

We can change the world, one child at a time. The task of making a difference in the world can be an overwhelming thought. Where can we even begin. Long ago I realized that my purpose in life is to change the world one child at a time. As a social worker, I help children to heal from trauma and pain. As a mother, I hope to teach my children to utilize their strengths and talents to give back to the communities they are a part of. And as a human being, I donate whatever resources I can to improving the conditions that children around the world live in.

I have always loved this story:

Once a man was walking along a beach. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. Off in the distance he could see a woman going back and forth between the surf's edge and and the beach. Back and forth this person went, throwing small objects into the sea. As the man got nearer, he could see that there were hundreds of starfish stranded on the sand as the result of the natural action of the tide.

The man was stuck by the the apparent futility of the task. There were far too many starfish. Many of them were sure to perish. Even so, the woman continued the task of picking up starfish one by one and throwing them into the surf.

As he approached the the woman, he said "You must be crazy! There are thousands of miles of beach covered with starfish. You can't possibly make a difference." The woman paused for a moment to look at the man. She then stooped down and pick up one more starfish and threw it back into the ocean. She turned back to the man and said, "I made a difference to that one!"

We recently learned that it only takes $200 to sponsor an Ethiopian girl's education for an entire year. Access to education is a privilege that Americans often take for granted, but it can truly mean the difference between life and death for some of these young women. Providing aid and famine relief is helpful for a short period, but teaching children skills that will allow them to procure jobs will ultimately make an enormous difference in the trajectory of their lives. We may not be able to help every child, but we can certainly make a difference in the life of one...