dreams, nightmares and nesting

I've mentioned previously that I have been having referral dreams the past couple of weeks. Most of these dreams have been very pleasant, and have left me longing for our referral.

Last night was different. In my dream, Jon and I were going about our daily routines when we noticed a large manilla envelope attached to our refrigerator. When we turned it over, we noticed that it was from CHSFS, dated 2 weeks ago. We tore it open immediately, thinking it must be some paperwork or a newsletter. However, we pulled out a referral for two boys.

The first thing that struck me was that they were white. We double checked, and the paperwork did clearly state that the boys were from Ethiopia. However, it also said that they were born to American missionaries who had died while in Ethiopia. I was shocked.

The next thing that we noticed was the apparent ages of the boys. The younger of the two was slightly over a year old -- well within our requested age range. The older boy was listed as being 5 years old. However, there was also a letter attached to his referral information from a college student from the University in the town where we live who had apparently spent his 5th birthday with him in Ethiopia 3 years ago. So in (dream) reality, this boy was 8.

Immediately in my dream (which was quickly becoming a nightmare) panic set in. We called the agency, who informed us that since there were no medical issues, we had to accept the referral or we would be kicked out of the program.

I woke up completely shaken by the craziness of this dream, but very glad that it wasn't real...

Once I officially got up this morning, I could no longer fight my desire to clean and organize every space in our home. I tore apart the closets, and planned an outing to buy storage containers and a shoe rack. This whole thing where I'm not allowed to buy anything is driving me absolutely mad. I could really use some retail therapy right now!

I guess you could say I'm nesting.